Saturday, October 25, 2008

Sex, Drugs, Rock 'n' Roll

The other day I was reading about the 6 Degrees of Music Separation Challenge that Beth Coffey was selling over at her blog, Cup of Coffey. Rather than participate legally in their little reindeer game and bring them to tears with the awesomeness of my selections thus ruining it for them when they realize the inferiority of their selections, I thought I'd go rogue and do my own. The idea is to come up with 6 songs that are linked in some way like the game 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Here's my 6 Degrees of Music Separation.

#1 - I'm starting off with Wendy O. Williams' band the Plasmatics and their version of No Class. With lyrics like, "Shut Up! You talk too loud! You don't fit in with the crowd!", "Too late, you're way out of line. No buddy I can't spare a dime!", and "Your perfect smile betrays your lack of style", it'll have you thinking of that total fucking asshole you have deal with on a regular basis. Yeah, you know, him/her! Jerkwad!

#2 - No Class, of course, was written by Motorhead's Lemmy who was hanging out with Wendy O for a while. I would be utterly negligent, then, if I failed to link No Class to Motorhead's We Are the Road Crew. If there is a band that musically links all the West Point Skateboarders together (more than any other anyways), it would have to be Motorhead. We Are the Road Crew was especially popular to the non-skateboarding skateboarders* who at one point called themselves the Road Crew, even taking it to the extent of only drinking RC Cola. You know, "RC" stands for "Road Crew"! When Jackson first played WATRC for me at the Teen Club, I thought, "This is catchy, but they need a new lead singer and another guitarist for a more polished sound." I've never been more wrong in my life.

#3 - Jealousy over Wendy O, among other things**, eventually caused Motorhead's guitarist, Fast Eddie Clarke, to leave the band, forming his own band, Fastway. Fastway had this amazing Led Zeppelin sound. In fact, I defy you to listen to Far Far From Home and not think it's Zeppelin. OK, singer David King's no Robert Plant, but still. Too bad Fastway's second album sucked so much.

#4 - The "Way" in "Fastway" was Pete Way (although he left Fastway before their albums were released), best known for being the bassist of UFO. UFO's masterpiece is, and there can be no argument, the greatest live performance of all-time, Strangers in the Night. From that album comes Rock Bottom, which has surely inspired many moments among the members of the WPSG similar to Elaine's boyfriend on Seinfeld with Desparado. Rock Bottom is simply the masterpiece of masterpieces. Recently, I was talking with a guy who makes and delivers my weekly meals , and he spotted my Strangers in the Night CD in my truck, and he begged, like you've never seen anyone beg before, to let him borrow it so he could burn a copy, mostly for Rock Bottom. There simply is no scale to measure the greatness of this one!

#5 - On February 18, 1980, Way and UFO guitarist Paul Chapman met briefly with a mutual friend and made plans to meet up later that night. Ultimately, they did not get together that night, and the friend partied without them. The next morning, the friend, AC/DC's Bon Scott, was found dead in a car after passing out on the drive home and being too heavy to be carried inside. I admit I was a little surprised when nobody argued with my labeling Whole Lotta Rosie the Greatest Rock Song of All-time, but then I'm always right and people just look foolish when they argue with me.

#6 - Within 5 months of Bon Scott's death, AC/DC released the album Back in Black. The cover was solid black on both sides. now has a black cover with a faint image in it, but back when it was originally released it was solid black. Another album with a solid black cover was Spinal Tap's Smell the Glove. From it, I give you Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight. Up-bup: fess up, you didn't see that connection coming, did ya?

If you're missing any of these classics from your music collection, feel free to download them here by clicking the links. Credit me with extra points for the Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'n' Roll theme intertwined with some of the WPSG's favorite music. Most of the musicians battled drug/alcohol problems, and many of them are dead including a string of drummers from Spinal Tap (man, can't anybody survive being their drummer?) Enjoy!

*Perhaps Billions can clear "nonskateboarding skateboarders" up for ya
**Legendary consumption of alcohol and illicit drugs


Beth said...

I'm giving this ten-point-five shades of awesome since I've never been a metal fan. I do, however, bow to your brilliant six-degreeing.

pistols at dawn said...

That is Holmesian in its deductions.

Jackson said...

Ask Tony about my many mixtapes created along these lines....

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